Friday, January 23, 2009

Finding gratitude in how others show their love

Do you recognize those small things that a loved one does for you? When they notice that you need a little space-even though they don't get what you're going through. When they do things just so you don't have to?

To recognize the love language of a spouse is magical! I think my husband and I have some great things that overlap and are in common (that's a great thing) but there are other things about us that are totally opposite. How I feel loved can be different from how he feels loved. It took me a long time to realize this and know that it is okay.

I have come to embrace this "communication" between us. I had a rough day yesterday (rough for me is relative - I have a positive outlook and things usually go without major events). I was stressing about a couple of calls that were on my calendar for last night and should I be on them vs sitting quiet with my family watching the recording of the first episode of LOST. Once I made the decision AND THEN ACCEPTED my decision, I was able to relax a little. Then I made a decision to simplify my morning and NOT go to the office for a mtg - instead call in. That meant I didn't have to get in the shower first thing and I could sit with a cup of coffee and my bowl of oatmeal. That sounded good to me last night.

So while I was sitting next to my husband watching LOST, he knew I needed a little TLC. I just wasn't myself. And even though I told him the craziness that was in my head, which I am sure he didn't get what the big deal was about, he supported me and tried to comfort me anyway. Because he loves me. Another great thing he did that I am grateful for is he turned on the Innertalk CD on Sleeping Soundly that is in the CD player next to our bed. He thought to do this on his own and he hugged me before we fell asleep and said "I thought this would help you".

My morning has been awesome! I slept well and am relaxed and ready to be present for the rest of the tasks for today. Yes I still haven't showered but it doesn't matter. I am going for a walk after my telecon/meeting and that will be good for me.

I am grateful for Fred's love language and how he wants to fix things for me. I am also grateful that I am not always too caught up in my own head to miss the efforts from my best friend!

Think about how differently people can express their love for you. What do you notice? Does it bring a smile to your face? I would love to know your experiences if you want to share.

Make it a great day and notice how someone else expresses their love for you :-)

1 comment:

Jennifer said...

Great article Janina. I need to learn how to really accept my decisions and settle myself with them-I am so easily overtaken with guilt that it eats up a ton of my energy. I am trying to lessen that load.